Breaking Up With People in General
Have you ever had to “dump” a hair stylist, photographer, house cleaner, gardener, child care provider, friend, grocery store, restaurant, dry cleaner, etc?
My personality is very “I don’t want to cause conflict and Dave is more ok with being direct and being able to say no”.
Christa and I have a sweet 89 year old tenant who we inherited when we bought our investment condo. She used to call Dave when something needed to be fixed, but he finally started to tell her no when she called for mundane things that anyone could do. When I was 7 months pregnant with Isabella she wanted Dave to come over and reattach the toilet chain. Dave drew the line, said no, and told her how to do it herself. From then on, she called sweet Brad who would never tell a sweet old lady no.
Today I had to break to with Sophia’s daycare. She goes to a franchise daycare. When we lived in Katy the girls LOVED school, they begged to go every day. I can remember taking Sophia to the doctor and her asking if I would drop her off at school. We automatically moved her to the same chain in our area. The director, staff, teachers, environment has been wonderful. The problem is that Sophia has not adjusted well to the new school. She cries every day and says she wants to stay home with me. It breaks my heart. I was desperate and went and checked out another program closer to our house. It was far below her current school. Dave and I prayed about it and decided three schools, three drop offs/ pick ups in one day was too stressful for all of us. We have made changes and December will be her last month at that particular school. I cowardly composed an email on a day that I kept her home with me and took her to the zoo with a few other moms. Now I just think it will be awkward until the end of December. Have I mentioned I try and avoid conflict?
I dumped my old hairdresser (who was young, but awesome) because she changed her price every time I went. My first highlight was $60.00, my second was $90.00, and then it only went up. What made me break up with her was that by the end of it, I was paying $150.00 for a full highlight (WAY TOO MUCH), but she always made excuses why she had to run and couldn’t blow dry my hair. The first few times I was ok, but then I finally realized that I didn’t want to spend $150.00 for a service and leave looking like a wet dog. That one was awkward because she sent me texts trying to get me back.
Christa and I went to the sweetest and very talented hairdresser Dana who works in an area of Houston called Rice Village. When I was single, it was not a big deal to drive the 45 minutes to an hour to get there. However, I had to find another hair person closer to me because when you have three kids, you are just thankful to find the two hours to get your hair done. Adding a couple hours of driving time is not realistic. I know that Dana (who has a child herself) understands this.
Breaking up with friends is probably almost as painful as a spouse. But, sometimes your friendship has run its course. I think the biggest reason certain friendships have run its course is because you realize you don’t have things in common with one or both partners. Some friendships are easy; you can go months or years and then pick up. Some friendships seem like work. Trust me, Dave and I have been dumped by friends. We get it. We are not everyone’s cup of tea. But that doesn’t make any of us bad people. The older we get in the more activities we get involved with, the more precious your family time becomes. You gravitate towards friendships that are not mentally draining and are just easy. The friendships where you can go for a period of time without seeing the person and then go have lunch and pick up right where you left off.
My question for you is this: Who is ready to go and dump someone? (JUST JOKING)… The question is really this: Have you ever had to non-romantically dump someone?